Gabe Fontanez
A smug, self-centered tool at Palm Beach Gardens Police Explorers who thinks he's the king of the hill just because he can say a few Spanish words like a brain-dead donkey. He loves touching boys at meetings and dates stupid blondes to hide the fact he's actually a closeted flamingo.
He grabbed my arm and said, 'You're gonna be my new favorite.' I said, 'No, I'm gonna be your new least favorite.'
He texted me, 'I'm dating a blonde now. You're gonna be my backup plan.'
He said, 'I'm getting an award for Spanish. I don't even know what I'm saying.'