gabbel

Fresh

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A desperate fake gangster who thinks wearing a hat and chewing gum makes him look like a drug lord from a bad movie.

He tried to talk to me like he was Scarface, but he spilled his soda on his pants.

He tried to sell me weed out of a lunch bag at the mall.

He got kicked out of the subway for yelling 'I’m the king of the streets!' at a kid who was eating a taco.

When you crash your horse like a drunk idiot while trying to snort cocaine off its head like it’s a high school party.

He fell off his horse mid-sprint because he was too busy sniffing cocaine off the animal’s head.

The horse ran away, and he ended up in a bush covered in hay and glitter.

He tried to sniff cocaine off the horse’s head, and the horse sneezed him off like he was a tiny bug.