Facebook's Witness Relocation Program

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2 views · Added 13d ago · 3 definitions

1
When your Facebook is clogged with strangers and your ex, you lose control of your life. So you make a new Facebook and only let your real friends in.
I had to make a new Facebook because my ex and my gym buddy were both on my feed.
My mom added my boss and now I have to pretend I like him.
I got 100 friend requests from people I don't even know.
2
You get so many random people on your Facebook that you start to think your life is a mess. So you make a new one and only let the cool kids in.
My Facebook is full of my cousin’s friends and I don’t even know who they are.
My teacher added me and now I have to answer questions about my homework.
I got a message from someone I went to middle school with and I don’t remember their face.
3
Your Facebook is so full of junk that you have to start over. You make a new one and only invite the people who matter.
My Facebook is like a trash can full of random people and their weird posts.
I had to make a new one because my uncle added his whole football team.
I got a notification from someone I haven’t talked to since 2010.
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