Facebook Voyeur
Facebook Voyeurs are fake busy people who claim they don't have time for Facebook but still log in every day to spy on your life like you're their personal entertainment.
'I’m too busy for Facebook,' he said. Then he stared at my status for 10 minutes.
She said she didn’t care about my party, but she knew I wore a hat and had pizza.
He told me he didn’t use Facebook, but he knew I had a dog named Biscuit.