facebook parasite
A Facebook parasite is someone who comments on everything you post, even if they've only seen you once at a gas station. They think they're your best friend, but they're just trying to feel important.
"Wow, you look like a hot dog in this photo!", from someone who’s never seen you eat a hot dog.
"This status is the worst thing I’ve ever read.", from someone who can’t read.
"You’re alive? I didn’t know you were alive.", from someone who’s been commenting for 3 years.