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A total Facebook newbie who doesn't know how to scroll down or post a selfie without falling asleep. They never grow up, but they can get better if they hang out with someone who knows what they're doing and isn't a total waste of space.
"Why is my timeline blank? Did I die?", posted at 2 AM
"Can you tell me how to like a post? I’ve been trying for three hours."
DM: "I joined a group called ‘Cool People’ and now I have 479 friends. What did I do?"