Facebook Masturbator - A Facebook Masturbator is someone who stares at pictures of

A Facebook Masturbator is someone who stares at pictures of other people on Facebook and gets hard, like they're in a porn movie.

I saw a picture of my ex and got a boner. I'm a mess.

I like my cousin's profile picture and now I'm sad.

I stared at a photo of my teacher for 10 minutes. I'm a loser.