Facebook Laundry

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2 views · Added 14d ago · 6 definitions

Facebook laundry is when you try to keep your big dumb secrets all to yourself but your whole damn world finds out in 15 seconds flat because you're too lazy to keep your mouth shut.

My ex got engaged and I didn't even know she had a ring on her finger. I saw it on her Instagram story and I was like, 'You told me you were single!'

My mom posted a picture of my dad's second wife's cat and it was like, 'This is the third cat I've had since I left you!'

My teacher posted a picture of my math test and I got a 37% and I was like, 'You didn't have to show that to the whole school!'

by Slangipedia 14d ago

Facebook laundry is when you think you're being sneaky with your secrets but your five hundred million friends are watching you like a hawk and they all laugh at you when you trip over your own lies.

I told my crush I had a cold but my friend tagged me in a video of me screaming at a dog and I was like, 'You told everyone? Why? What's wrong with you?'

I said I didn't have a job but my boss posted a picture of my LinkedIn and I was like, 'You didn't have to do that!'

I told my sister I didn't have a boyfriend but my brother posted a picture of us holding hands and I was like, 'You're so dead!'

by Slangipedia 14d ago

Facebook laundry is when you're trying to be cool and private but your whole world knows your secrets before your pants are even on.

I said I was going to the movies but my best friend posted a picture of me eating pizza in the theater and I was like, 'You told the whole school? What's wrong with you?'

I said I didn't like my math teacher but my math teacher posted a picture of me crying over a test and I was like, 'You told everyone? I'm gonna fail!'

I said I didn't like my lunch but my mom posted a picture of me throwing it on the floor and I was like, 'You told the whole class? I'm never gonna eat again!'

by Slangipedia 14d ago

Facebook laundry is when you're trying to be cool and you think your secrets are safe but five hundred million people see them all at once and it's like your whole world laughed at you.

I said I didn't like my crush but my crush posted a picture of us holding hands and I was like, 'You told everyone? I'm never gonna live this down!'

I said I didn't have a job but my friend posted a picture of me working and I was like, 'You told the whole class? I'm gonna fail!'

I said I didn't like my math teacher but my math teacher posted a picture of me crying over a test and I was like, 'You told everyone? What's wrong with you?'

by Slangipedia 14d ago

Facebook laundry is like your dirty laundry but instead of your mom finding out, it's your whole damn world finding out in five seconds and you're like, 'What even is life anymore?'

I said I didn't have a job but my boss posted a picture of me working and I was like, 'You told the whole school? I'm never gonna live this down!'

I said I didn't have a crush but my crush posted a picture of me holding hands and I was like, 'You told the whole class? I'm never gonna be cool again!'

I said I didn't like my math teacher but my math teacher posted a picture of me crying over a test and I was like, 'You told everyone? What's wrong with you?'

by Slangipedia 14d ago

Facebook laundry is your private secrets but they're not private anymore because five hundred million people see them and laugh at you like it's your job to be embarrassed.

I said I didn't have a crush but my crush posted a picture of me holding hands and I was like, 'You told the whole school? I'm gonna die!'

I said I didn't like my math teacher but my math teacher posted a picture of me crying over a test and I was like, 'You told everyone? I'm gonna fail!'

I said I didn't have a job but my boss posted a picture of me working and I was like, 'You told the whole class? I'm never gonna be cool again!'

by Slangipedia 14d ago