Face-cracking

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4 views · Added 17d ago · 7 definitions

1
You log into Facebook so much you can’t sleep, your eyes look like they’re about to fall out, and you’re too wired to even care that your brain is melting.
I stayed up till 3 a. m. just to check my Facebook. My face is so cracked I look like a raccoon that got hit by a truck.
My face is so cracked I think I can see my mom’s face in my mirror.
I cracked my face so bad I could’ve been a contestant on America’s Got Talent.
2
When something shocking happens and your face looks like it’s about to explode from the inside out.
When my ex posted a picture of me eating a taco with a burger on top, I face-cracked so hard I nearly fainted.
My friend told me he dated my crush and I face-cracked so bad I had to leave the room.
When I saw my dog wearing a hat, I face-cracked like I just saw a ghost.
3
A gay guy’s face goes from zero to absolute chaos when he gets embarrassed or something stupid happens.
My face cracked so bad when my crush asked me out and I said no.
When I told my friend I didn’t like his haircut, he face-cracked and I had to run out.
When my ex said my face looked like a pizza that fell in a river, I face-cracked and cried.
4
You’re so addicted to Facebook it’s like it’s your second brain, and you’re too messed up to care.
I check Facebook more than I check my phone, and I’m too messed up to even eat breakfast.
I’m face-cracked so bad I don’t even know what day it is.
Facebook is my life and I can’t live without it.
5
A fancy name for Facebook that’s so annoying it’s basically a curse.
Facebook is like my ex, and I can’t get rid of it.
Facebook is the worst thing to ever happen to me.
I hate Facebook so much I wish it would die in a fire.
6
A fat dude who farts so loud it sounds like a jet engine, and you have to run away.
My uncle farted so loud I had to leave the room and cry.
The guy next to me farted so hard I thought I was in a war.
That fat guy farted so loud it woke up my entire neighborhood.
7
You embarrass someone so bad their face looks like it got hit by a brick wall.
I told my friend his haircut looked like a cat had clawed him, and he face-cracked.
When I said my crush was ugly, he face-cracked and I had to run.
I told my teacher I didn’t know how to do the problem and he face-cracked.
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