Face-app-phobia

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2 views · Added 13d ago · 6 definitions

1
When you get so mad at Facebook apps stealing your data that you scream into your pillow.
I let Facebook know my dog's name and now they know my secrets. I'm mad.
My ex got my location through a game. I'm gonna kill that app.
I opened an app and it asked for my birthdate. I said 'no' and it cried.
2
When you're so scared of apps knowing everything about you that you start talking to your plants.
I told my plant my password. It didn't steal it. I felt safe.
My app knows I eat cereal for dinner. My plants don't. I'm loyal to them.
I whispered my dreams to my cactus. It didn't post them online.
3
When you refuse to let any app get near your info because you think they'll sell it to your mom.
I wouldn't let my app talk to my mom. She'd nag me forever.
My app told my mom I eat pizza for breakfast. She's mad at me.
I blocked my app from telling my mom my favorite song. She hates that song.
4
When you're so annoyed at apps taking your data that you start throwing phones at the wall.
I threw my phone at the wall because my app leaked my secrets.
My app told my boss I work 24/7. I threw my phone at the wall.
I threw my phone at the wall because my app posted my lunchtime on Instagram.
5
When you're so fed up with apps knowing your business that you start talking to your phone like it's your enemy.
I told my phone, 'You don't know me. I don't like you.'
My app asked me my favorite color. I said, 'I hate you.'
I yelled at my phone because it told my friends I'm ugly.
6
When you're so terrified of apps stealing your data that you start hiding in the closet with your socks.
I hid in the closet with my socks because my app might steal my identity.
I wore socks in the closet and my app didn't find me. I'm safe.
My app found me in the closet. I ran away with my socks.
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