E.T. Swag
A moron with lips so big they could choke a chicken and still have room for a pizza.
My neighbor is an E. T. Swag. He tried to kiss my dog and the dog ran away.
My friend’s an E. T. Swag. He kissed a pizza and now it’s soggy.
That guy at the mall is an E. T. Swag. He tried to kiss the escalator and it stopped.