Eastern oregon

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3 views · Added 17d ago · 3 definitions

1
Eastern Oregon is where the Cascades throw a wall between Oregon and misery. It’s a dry, dusty, never-ending desert where people wear guns like jewelry and vote like they’ve been shot. Cows, dirt, and bad decisions rule the land.
'I moved to Eastern Oregon and my pants are now permanently stained with sagebrush.'
'My brother says he’s a cowboy. I’ve seen him ride a tractor.'
'The only thing growing in Eastern Oregon is my rage and my beard.'
2
Eastern Oregon is a college that thinks it’s Harvard, but it’s just a bunch of people in a town that’s so small it forgets it exists. The only thing open is the taco bell, and if it’s closed, you’re getting a knife fight.
'I went to Eastern Oregon for college. My degree is in survival.'
'I tried to go to a party there. The only people there were my dog and a man wearing a hat that said ‘Trump 2020.’'
'I asked for pizza. They said, ‘We have taco bell. That’s a luxury.’'
3
Eastern Oregon is the big chunk of Oregon that includes eight counties, some of which are so far out they think they’re in a different state. It’s got cows, mountains, and people who still think Trump is a real person.
'My cousin lives in Eastern Oregon. He says he’s from a county. I say he’s from a different planet.'
'I tried to call my friend in Eastern Oregon. The phone said ‘No service. Also, no life.’'
'Eastern Oregon is where the map ends, and my sanity begins.'
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