EarthBound Zero

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A poop-smelling game that was supposed to come out way before EarthBound but got stuck in a toilet clogged with glitter and regret.

I played EarthBound Zero and it was like eating a expired burrito in a sock.

My mom said it was the worst game ever. I said she was just mad I beat her at Mario Kart.

My brother cried when he saw the purple dragon. It was like a scream in a jar.

A game that was hidden in a cabinet like a fat kid in a gym and finally came out after EarthBound got popular.

I found EarthBound Zero in the attic. It was like finding a dead rat wearing a crown.

My friend said it was the most annoying game ever. I said he was just jealous I had the gold trophy.

My dog bit the controller. Now it’s stuck in a tree.

A game that was supposed to be EarthBound's baby brother but got stuck in a time-out for 20 years.

I played EarthBound Zero and it was like being stuck in a math class with a snoring teacher.

My brother called it the worst game ever. I said he was just mad I got a higher score.

My cat walked all over the game. Now it’s covered in hair and sadness.