earth sex
When a guy who can’t get a date sticks his junk in the mud like it’s a dating app and hopes the ground will accept him.
He did earth sex in the backyard. The dog ran away and didn’t come back for a week.
My cousin tried earth sex on a rainy night. He came inside with mud all over his pants and a sad face.
He did earth sex in the mall. The security guard kicked him out and said he was a weirdo.