Earl Pearl showed up to my mom’s birthday party with a mullet that looked like it had been dragged through a mud puddle. He wore a Nascar shirt and yelled, 'I’m here to beat your dad at the race!'

At the grocery store, Earl Pearl tried to flirt with the cashier. He said, 'You got a nice mullet. I bet you could win a Nascar race.'

Earl Pearl sent me a DM: 'I got a new mullet. It’s so good, I might start a Nascar team. You in?'