Daft Bugger
A person so thick they think a tomato is a fruit. They’re the human version of a doorknob.
My daft bugger uncle tried to build a shed with a pizza box. It collapsed in 10 minutes.
My daft bugger mom thinks she’s a rockstar. She sang in the shower and it was a disaster.
My daft bugger dad thinks he’s a wizard. He turned the TV off by throwing a pillow at it.