Dad-Hard

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When you think having 10 IPAs in one night is a badge of honor, and you’re too proud to admit you’re gonna puke.

I had 10 IPAs and still texted my mom about it. She said I was a disgrace.

He passed out on the couch, but still managed to text his dad: 'I’m not done yet.'

She drank so much she called her dad ‘Sir’ and he said, 'You’re gonna regret that.'

A dad who thinks he’s the only one who can boss you around, and he’ll use his power to make your life miserable if you don’t do what he says.

He squeezed my arm so hard I thought it was gonna fall off. He said, 'You’re lucky I’m not your mom.'

He called me at 2 a. m. because I stayed out too late. I was too scared to answer.

He sent me a note that said, 'You’re dead to me.' I got home and he was eating cereal like nothing happened.

A dad who shows up at your school to drag you out in front of everyone, just because you did something stupid.

He showed up at my school and said, 'You’re coming home with me right now.'

He picked me up after I skipped class and drove in silence for 30 minutes.

He came to my game and told my teacher, 'I’m taking him home.' I was too embarrassed to look at anyone.