Baaqir
a human who can make even the most boring day feel like a war zone with popcorn and insults
Baaqir walked into my lunch break and said, 'I'm here to fight the sandwich.' I got a standing ovation and a bruised sandwich.
Baaqir told my mom, 'You're not a woman. You're a tired sock.' My mom cried and got a new sock.
Baaqir showed up at my soccer game and said, 'I'm here to fight the goalpost.' The goalpost ran away.