baaaawbie

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the kind of people who think they’re smart but are just loud and stupid

My cousin is a baaaawbie. He yells at the TV and still loses at Mario Kart.

My teacher called me a baaaawbie because I failed math but passed drama.

My friend’s dog is a baaaawbie. It barks at the mailman and eats my homework.

the human version of a broken toaster that still thinks it’s fancy

My mom is a baaaawbie. She spends $100 on a salad and still yells at the grocery store.

My neighbor is a baaaawbie. He wears a hat to bed and claims he’s a king.

My brother is a baaaawbie. He cried when he spilled milk and still won’t stop talking about it.

people who act like they’re important but are just sad and confused

My friend’s uncle is a baaaawbie. He wears a cape and talks to the plants.

My gym teacher is a baaaawbie. He thinks he’s a superhero and still can’t do a push-up.

My sister is a baaaawbie. She drew a mustache on my face and still thinks it’s art.

the kind of person who thinks they’re cool but just smell like old socks and regret

My dad is a baaaawbie. He wears slippers to work and still talks about his high school crush.

My math teacher is a baaaawbie. She thinks she’s a rockstar and still can’t solve the problem.

My dog is a baaaawbie. He eats my shoes and still barks at the vacuum.

people who act like they’re on a mission but just forgot their pants and their brain

My brother is a baaaawbie. He ran out of the house shouting, ‘I’m saving the world!’ and forgot his pants.

My cousin is a baaaawbie. She wears pajamas to school and still thinks she’s a spy.

My friend’s mom is a baaaawbie. She yelled at the mailman and still can’t find her keys.

the kind of person who thinks they’re famous but just got kicked out of a restaurant and still thinks it’s a flex

My neighbor is a baaaawbie. He got kicked out of a burger place and still thinks he’s a legend.

My friend’s dad is a baaaawbie. He tried to fight a waiter and still claims he won.

My teacher is a baaaawbie. She thinks she’s a movie star and still can’t spell ‘famous’.