a week in the jail
A week in the jail is when someone is so slow, they could make a clock cry. Especially if it’s a soccer player who takes forever to do something simple.
"He’s got a week in the jail. I thought the game was going to end before halftime.", Friend watching the match
"I swear he’s got a week in the jail. He’s like a turtle on a treadmill.", Classmate at lunch
"He took so long to pass the ball, I think he’s got a week in the jail.", Teammate on the field