A Steven Segal
A Steven Segal is like a B-movie star who thinks he’s God, only he’s not, and he’s got zero skills, but he still thinks he’s got a plan.
He fights like a kid who thinks he’s in a Marvel movie, but it’s just a gym class.
His slow-mo punches are more dramatic than my failed relationship.
He kills people with one punch, but it’s only because he used CGI.