A Schmidt

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#frog neck #boring teacher #loud grandma

4 views · Added 17d ago · 7 definitions

A Schmidt is a grandma with a frog neck who can’t hear you even if you shout in her face. She yaps about math so much it feels like you’re stuck in a never-ending lesson.

My Schmidt teacher talked so loud I thought my ears were gonna pop.

I fell asleep during Schmidt’s history lesson. I dreamt about pizza.

Schmidt gave a 20-minute lecture on how to tie your shoes. I’ve never been so bored in my life.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A Schmidt is a person who looks harmless but will knock your lights out if you mess with them. Don’t underestimate them, they’ve got a hidden punch.

I laughed at Schmidt. He punched me in the gut. I cried like a baby.

Schmidt looked like a peace-lover. Then he kicked my ass.

I told Schmidt he was ugly. He challenged me to a duel. I lost.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A Schmidt is a fancy name for someone who bangs metal all day. It’s like being a metalworker but with more sweat and fewer breaks.

My cousin’s a Schmidt. He works in a factory. He smells like burnt metal.

Schmidts are the real metalheads of the world.

Schmidt’s job is just hammering metal until it screams.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A Schmidt is the sweetest person ever. They’re like a candy bar that never runs out of sugar. If you’re lucky, you get one.

My Schmidt aunt gave me a cookie. I ate it. It was the best day ever.

Schmidt gave me a hug. I felt like I was floating.

Schmidt is the cutest person in the whole world. I would follow her anywhere.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A Schmidt is when you poop in a pool or any water that isn’t a toilet. It’s like you’re telling the world you’re messy.

Schmidt pooped in the pool. The water turned green.

I saw Schmidt poop in the lake. I ran away screaming.

Schmidt pooped in the bathtub. I had to take a shower twice.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A Schmidt is when you hold it in during something important, like a test or a concert. You’re trying not to poop your pants but you’re failing.

I was taking a test and Schmidt held it in so hard I thought he was gonna explode.

Schmidt went to a concert and tried not to poop. He failed.

During the class presentation, Schmidt had to hold it in. He was sweating like a mad man.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A Schmidt is when you take a smelly woman to an alley, strip her, and tape her to a pole. Then you have sex with her and poop on the ground right before you finish.

Schmidt took my sister to the alley. She was taped to a pole. I was scared.

Schmidt had sex with a woman and then pooped in the street. He’s a monster.

I saw Schmidt do his thing in the alley. I ran away like a coward.

by Slangipedia 16d ago