A Literal Piece of Lettuce

I said, 'Why do Asians eat so much rice? Because they're lazy!' My friend laughed. My teacher gave me a warning.

My DMs: 'Why do Black people talk so loud? Because they don’t know how to whisper!' My friend said it was gold.

In class, I said, 'Why do Mexicans eat tacos? Because they can’t afford pizza!' My teacher said I was a literal piece of lettuce.

I said, 'Why do Indians wear turbans? Because they can’t find a hat!' My teacher wrote it on the board and said, 'That’s gold!' I said, 'Gold? I’m a piece of lettuce!'

My friend said, 'Why do Africans have dark skin? Because they’re not clean!' I laughed. My teacher said, 'That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard!' I said, 'I’m a literal piece of lettuce!'

I told a joke about why Hispanics are loud, and my teacher said, 'That’s the worst joke I’ve ever heard! You’re a literal piece of lettuce!'

I said, 'Why do Italians eat so much pasta? Because they don’t have any brains!' My friend laughed. My teacher said, 'That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard!' I said, 'I’m a literal piece of lettuce!'

My friend said, 'Why do Asians have so many kids? Because they’re all in the same family!' I laughed. My teacher said, 'That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard!' I said, 'I’m a literal piece of lettuce!'

In class, I said, 'Why do Black people talk so loud? Because they can’t hear!' My teacher said, 'That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard! You’re a literal piece of lettuce!'