a Kirkland
When you're sleeping in the woods and some idiot dood grabs your junk and wakes you up like it's a goddamn emergency.
I woke up to my buddy’s hand in my pants. Bro code is dead.
Some dood took my nap time and turned it into a grab-and-go snack.
I was dreaming of tacos and woke up to a hand in my pants. What even is life?