A Kaulia Bench

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A bench that’s more like a cursed plank you sit on for hours until your bones scream at you.

My gym teacher made us sit on a Kaulia Bench for 20 minutes. I still can’t feel my legs.

That bench is a death trap. I swear it tried to eat me.

I sat on that thing for lunch and now my butt is a permanent feature of the floor.

A bench so low it’s basically the ground, but it’s still there to mock you.

I tripped over it and fell flat on my face. It was like the bench was laughing at me.

It’s not a bench. It’s a taunt from the floor.

I sat on it and it felt like the floor was trying to give me a wedgie.

A bench that’s just a plank and a grudge. It doesn’t care about you.

I sat on that thing and it was like it was giving me the silent treatment.

That bench doesn’t even have legs. It’s just a plank with a bad attitude.

I asked it if it wanted to be a real bench and it just stared at me.