A Jasper

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#sandwich thief#bridge dweller#arm freak

5 views · Added 17d ago · 7 definitions

1
Jasper is a sandwich-stealing freak with arms longer than a football field who lives under a bridge and eats sandwiches like they’re going out of style.
Jasper stole my sandwich and then laughed like a maniac while eating it.
I saw Jasper’s arms stretch across the entire bridge just to grab a sandwich.
He eats sandwiches so fast, I think he’s trying to choke on them.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
2
Jasper is a walking miracle who can make you happy in a blink, but he’s also a total mess who probably eats glue for fun.
Jasper smiled at me, and suddenly I forgot all my problems.
He tried to help me with math and just said, ‘I think I’m allergic to numbers.’
He said he’s ‘magnificent,’ but he also called a teacher a ‘fart in a suit.’
by Slangipedia 16d ago
3
Jasper is a walking sunshine who can light up your day, but don’t let him near your math homework or your crush.
Jasper made me laugh so hard, I cried.
He told me I was ‘brighter than the sun,’ which I’m not, but I’ll take it.
He doesn’t know I like him, and I’m dying from it.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
4
Jasper is the kind of guy who will help you out even if he’s eating a sandwich while doing it.
Jasper helped me move my couch and ate a sandwich in between.
He said, ‘I’m here for you, buddy,’ while chewing a sandwich like it was a problem.
He’s always there, even if he’s busy eating or being weird.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
5
Jasper is a nice guy who’s also a total clueless idiot who doesn’t even know he’s amazing.
He said he was ‘kind and funny,’ but he also called a teacher a ‘fart in a suit.’
He has no idea I like him, and he’s totally oblivious to everything.
He’s a nice guy, but he’s also a walking disaster.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
6
Jasper is a weird human who talks like he’s mad and probably thinks violence is the best way to solve problems.
He said, ‘Violence is not the answer. Violence is the question and the answer is yes.’
He told me he wasn’t ‘wanking’, he was ‘face wanking.’
He said, ‘It’s not a free country when I’m around.’
by Slangipedia 16d ago
7
Jasper is Lee Jong Suk’s man. He’s hot, he’s sexy, and he’s basically the best thing to ever happen to Earth.
Jasper is so hot, he makes my heart stop.
He’s ‘sexy af’ and I’m not even being mean about it.
He’s the best man alive, and I swear it on my life.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
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