My cousin works at a pill pusher place and says they don’t know what they’re selling, just that it’s ‘magic.’

The pill pusher at the store told me I needed ‘a whole bunch of pills’ to fix my mood, which is just a fancy way of saying ‘I’m high on coffee.’

My dad’s boss is a pill pusher and he says he makes more money than doctors, even though he can’t spell ‘aspirin.’