a good ol' rub

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when you slather your meat with seasoning like it's the last day on earth and you're gonna die if you don't cook it right

My chicken looked like it had been through a war. I gave it a good ol' rub and said, 'you're gonna be legendary.'

I put so much rub on that steak it had a second layer of skin.

I rubbed my meat so hard I probably gave it a complex.

when someone tells you to rub your meat and they're really telling you to go jerk off in front of them

My buddy told me to give my meat a good ol' rub. I took it as a challenge and started jerking off in the middle of the grocery store.

She said, 'give your meat a good ol' rub,' and I took that as a personal attack.

I was cooking and my friend said, 'give your meat a good ol' rub,' and I said, 'why don't you give yours a good ol' rub?'

when you laugh like a silly idiot because you’re so happy you’re cooking or you just got told to go jerk off

I heard 'give your meat a good ol' rub,' and I laughed so hard I spilled my beer.

My dog gave me a good ol' rub and I laughed like I was the king of the world.

I got told to go jerk off and I laughed like I was paid to do it.