a fart in a mitten

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Something or someone that rolls around like a drunk pig, completely lost and too lazy to care how they got stuck or how to get free.

My cousin rolling around in the back of the van like a feral raccoon.

My dog in the laundry room, spinning like a tornado made of hair.

My kid at the mall, running in circles like a chicken with no head.

When you’re stuck in a tiny space and you bounce like a madman who just saw a pigeon steal his sandwich.

My little brother in the car during a 3-hour road trip, bouncing like he was on a trampoline.

A group of swimmers on a bus, squishing like sardines in a can.

My son in bed, bouncing like he was trying to shake a bedbug out of his ear.

You know it's there, it's loud, and it won't stop, but you can't do a thing about it, it's just there to make your life worse.

My sister's queef during a Zoom call, making everyone laugh and cry.

My dog’s fart during a quiet dinner, breaking the peace like a loud explosion.

My kid's queef during a math test, making me want to scream and throw things.

When something is bouncing off walls like a drunkard with a rocket and a bad attitude.

My dog running into the wall like he was trying to punch it.

My kid bouncing off the furniture like he had a rocket in his butt.

A ball in a tiny room, bouncing like it had a grudge against everything.

A girl who queefs so much, it's like she's got a mini volcano in her butt and it's erupting every five minutes.

My friend queefing during a movie, making everyone laugh and cover their noses.

My cousin queefing during a yoga class, breaking the calm like a loud explosion.

My sister queefing during a quiet dinner, making everyone want to run away.