A Diaperbreath
A guy in New York who thinks wearing a suit means he can grab kids and say he's cool.
"I'm Mr. Cool, and I'm giving you a lollipop if you let me sit next to you.", Diaperbreath at the bus stop
"I'm not a pervert, I'm just a professional.", Diaperbreath on the subway
"I'm here for the pizza, not the kids.", Diaperbreath at the pizza shop