A Cowell

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#talent-show-hell#asshole-judge#simon-cowell

5 views · Added 17d ago · 7 definitions

1
A Cowell is a loudmouth who yells at people for being awesome, acts like a total prick, and thinks he’s the best thing since sliced bread. He lives in his own stinking backside, and his name comes from a guy named Simon who was a real pain in the ass.
@SimonCowell: You think you're good? You're just a sad, tired, washed-up has-been!
Why did you even audition? You're not even a decent singer!
You think you're special? You're just a bunch of noise!
by Slangipedia 16d ago
2
A Cowell is like a smelly, rotten piece of meat stuck in your gut. It’s also called ‘the Cowels’, because nothing is more disgusting than a bunch of smelly, rotten meat stuck in your gut.
I got a Cowell from eating too much pizza and not enough salad.
My dog got a Cowell after eating my old socks.
My uncle got a Cowell and now he smells like a dead raccoon.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
3
A Cowell is when you mess with a dog’s junk and get a big, bloody bite on your face. It’s a real mess, and it looks like your face got run over by a meat grinder.
I touched the dog’s balls and got bit on the face. It looked like I had a face full of meat grinder.
My brother touched a dog’s balls and now he has a scar that looks like a meat grinder ran over him.
I touched the dog’s junk, and now my face looks like it got hit by a meat grinder.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
4
A Cowell is a smooth-talking guy who hits on women with lines so good, they fall for him like a sack of potatoes. He’s got a 98.4% success rate, and he doesn’t care if you’re a total mess.
‘Do I know you? You look like my next girlfriend.’, And she fell for it like a sack of potatoes.
‘You look like my next girlfriend.’, And she fell for it like it was a free pizza.
‘You look like my next girlfriend.’, And she fell for it like it was a winning lottery ticket.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
5
A Cowell is an old, smelly, grumpy guy who taught a boy band how to sing, but treated them like dirt. He also yells at people on TV and acts like he’s the king of the world.
He told One Direction they were a bunch of sad, wet noodles and didn’t even know how to sing.
He screamed at a kid for being himself and flew him halfway across the world just to yell at him.
He treated his contestants like garbage and acted like he was the king of the world.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
6
A Cowell is like Gordon Ramsay, but for talent shows. He yells at people who aren’t even half-decent, and he has no idea how to sing, dance, or act.
He screamed at a kid for singing like a wet noodle and called him a ‘disaster.’
He yelled at a dancer like he was Gordon Ramsay and called her a ‘disaster.’
He yelled at a singer for being a ‘disaster’ and called him a ‘disaster.’
by Slangipedia 16d ago
7
A Cowell is a total jerk who flew a happy, young guy halfway across the world to yell at him for being himself. He’s the worst, except when it comes to TPWK, where you get to be a total prick.
He flew a kid halfway across the world to yell at him for being a happy, young guy.
He screamed at a kid for being himself and flew him halfway across the world just to yell at him.
He flew a kid across the world to yell at him, and he didn’t even know how to sing.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
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