a country unicorn

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1
A country unicorn is a girl who’s so good she’s like a magical beast from the south. She loves trucks, dirt, and kicking yuppies in the face when they get too cocky.
My cousin’s a unicorn. She hunts deer and still has time to make the best cornbread in Louisiana.
I dated a unicorn once. She took me muddin and then told my ex to shut up and leave me alone.
My mom says I’m a unicorn. I don’t know if that’s a compliment or a warning.
2
A country unicorn is a girl who’s tough as a cow hoof and sweet as a peach. She’s got a heart of gold and a fist full of dirt.
My neighbor is a unicorn. She’s got a horse, a dog, and a truck that’s louder than a rock concert.
My sister’s a unicorn. She can cook, hunt, and still kick my ass at poker.
My best friend’s a unicorn. She wears camo and still looks good enough to be on a billboard.
3
A country unicorn is a rare thing. She’s got love, loyalty, and the power to make yuppies cry.
My grandma’s a unicorn. She’s been cooking, muddin, and loving my grandpa for 60 years.
My friend’s a unicorn. She took down three yuppies at a bar and still smiled while doing it.
I’m a unicorn. I love camo, trucks, and I don’t take no crap from nobody.
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