a closing time
Trying to get laid at closing time by grabbing the biggest, most drunk woman at the bar, and you might need a plank tied to your ass just to survive the fall.
'I tried to get laid at closing time. She was drunk and huge. I needed a plank.', @plankman
'Planking is my life now. I’m stuck with that big woman.', @plankinglife
'I tried planking, but I fell into her.', @drunkwoman