a bag full of assholes

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Feeling like you were hit by a truck and then fed a plate of old spaghetti and motor oil.

I woke up with a hangover so bad I thought my brain was trying to escape through my nose.

My dog ran away after I took a whiff of my breath.

I ate three pancakes and still felt like I had a stomach full of bricks.

So ugly or smelly it makes your eyes water and your nose run like a fountain.

I saw a guy in the street and he looked like he’d been dipped in a sewer and left to rot.

My sister’s dog ran away from me and hid under the couch.

My neighbor’s house smelled like a dead raccoon had a party in there.

Looking at you makes you want to throw up and also question your entire life choices.

I saw you and I instantly knew I would never be happy again.

My friend’s dog ran in circles and then passed out.

I looked at you and my brain started to scream for help.

Looking into a bag of bloody, cut-out assholes while also being hit with the stench of raw, unfiltered, human waste.

I looked at the bag and instantly felt like I was going to vomit and cry at the same time.

My dog looked at me and then ran into the street like it was trying to escape a horror movie.

I took one look and my brain went on strike.