p'dang

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Slicing someone’s face with a blade while they’re still blinking.

Bro just got p’dang’d in the middle of a Fortnite match. Now he’s crying into his headset.

My cousin got p’dang’d at the mall. Now his nose is a cherry on top of a sundae.

That guy got p’dang’d by a guy wearing a tutu. It was the worst fashion statement ever.

Cutting someone’s head off like they’re a chicken at a barbecue.

She got p’dang’d by her ex at the grocery store. Now she’s buying ice cream for the whole family.

He got p’dang’d in the middle of a Zoom call. His boss was confused.

My dog got p’dang’d by a guy who looked like a pirate. He’s still barking at the ceiling.

Blade-assisted facial restructuring. No anesthesia. Just rage.

My brother got p’dang’d at the park. Now he looks like a pancake with a face.

That kid got p’dang’d during a math test. Now he’s crying over fractions.

My neighbor got p’dang’d by a guy who said, 'You look like a bad hair day.'

Using a knife to make someone’s face look like a broken toaster.

She got p’dang’d at the bus stop. Now she’s late to work and her face is a mess.

That guy got p’dang’d by his dad. Now he’s wearing a bandana like a rockstar.

My little sister got p’dang’d by a guy who said, 'You look like a muffin.'

Cutting someone’s face in half and calling it a haircut.

He got p’dang’d at the gym. Now he’s doing push-ups with a face like a melted candle.

That lady got p’dang’d by a guy with a beard. Now she’s questioning her life choices.

My friend got p’dang’d by a guy who said, 'You look like a bad haircut.'