Painful Laughing

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1
Laughing so hard your guts feel like they're being kicked by a donkey. Usually happens when you're high and someone says something stupid.
My cousin laughed so hard he threw up on my sister's new shoes.
I was high and my friend told a joke about a squirrel wearing pants. I died laughing.
My mom started laughing so hard she fell off the couch and broke her hip.
2
When your laugh turns into a scream and your ribs feel like they're going to pop. Usually happens when you're wasted and you hear something absurd.
My brother laughed so hard he turned into a human squeaker toy.
I was drunk and heard a man yell 'I'm a chicken!' and I lost it.
My friend laughed so hard her nose started bleeding.
3
Laughing until you're out of breath and your face looks like it's been hit by a pancake. Usually happens when you're stoned and you hear a terrible joke.
My cousin laughed so hard he turned into a pancake human.
I was stoned and my friend told a joke about a duck in a bakery. I couldn't breathe.
My sister laughed so hard her face looked like a melted crayon.
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