paddle swatcher

Fresh
#riverfail#outdoorfail#cityrat

0 views · Added 1d ago · 3 definitions

1
City rats who think they're outdoorsy just because they saw a river once and now they're out there flailing like fools.
My cousin tried to tube down the river and ended up stuck in a log like a trapped raccoon.
That guy tried to kayak and fell off the boat like a kid who just failed PE.
They brought a tent and a phone but forgot how to breathe.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
2
People from concrete jungles who think rivers are just fancy sidewalks and try to paddle like they're on a treadmill.
She tried to canoe and it looked like she was fighting a turtle for her life.
He brought a snack and a selfie stick but not a clue about currents.
They all got stuck in a rapids and screamed like they were being chased by bears.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
3
Flatlanders who think they're rugged just because they put on a hat and went tubing, but they're just there to take pictures and complain about the cold.
They took 200 photos of the river but didn’t know which way to go.
He tried to kayak and it looked like he was doing a dance-off with the water.
They brought a sandwich and a complaint about the wind.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
xs