Pack's Mom

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A tiny, brain-damaged monkey who caught a disease from a dirty toilet and then had a baby with a dwarf who had no idea what a toilet was.

She’s like a monkey who got hit by a bus and then married a man who forgot how to breathe.

Her face looks like it was squeezed by a raccoon with a fever.

I swear she was born in a trash can and cried in slow motion.

A human who got stuck in a blender with a dead raccoon and then had a baby with a man who slept in a shoe.

She’s like a science experiment that failed twice.

I think she was born in a dumpster and cried in slow motion.

She looks like she was dipped in glue and then stepped on by a donkey.

A half-monkey, half-toilet seat, half-disease, and fully insane.

She’s like a monster that was born in a garbage truck.

I swear she was made by a mad scientist who hates humans.

She looks like she was hit by a truck and then stepped on by a goat.