Package Five

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2 views · Added 6d ago · 5 definitions

Free stuff you get when you’re lucky enough to be a VIP and not some broke kid who can’t afford to pay for sh*t.

I got Package Five and skipped the line. You had to wait 8 hours and still paid $500.

My cousin got Package Five and I got stuck with a $300 hotel room and a sandwich.

I asked for Package Five and got told to ‘shut up and take my money’.

The gaming gods giving you a break because they feel sorry for you and your sad little budget.

Got Package Five and cried happy tears in my hotel room. You paid for a table at the E3 buffet and still got kicked out.

My friend got Package Five and I had to eat expired pizza and pretend I was cool.

I begged for Package Five and got denied because I wore a ‘I hate E3’ shirt.

A miracle that only happens once in a blue moon, and only if you’re not a sweaty, screaming fan who shows up late.

Got Package Five and sat in the front row. You stood in the back and got yelled at by a guy wearing a f***ing VR headset.

My coworker got Package Five and I had to eat a muffin and a regret.

I showed up 2 hours late and got told I was ‘not worthy’ of Package Five.

A holy grail for gamers, but only if you’re not a broke kid who can’t afford to stop eating pizza.

Got Package Five and ate like a king. You ate pizza and cried like a baby.

My brother got Package Five and I got stuck with a $400 hotel bill and a headache.

I asked for Package Five and got told I was ‘not special enough’.

The best part of E3 for people who aren’t stuck paying for everything and being yelled at by strangers.

Got Package Five and skipped the line. You waited 3 hours and got yelled at by a guy who looked like a wizard.

My friend got Package Five and I got stuck with a $200 hotel room and a f***ing sandwich.

I asked for Package Five and got denied because I had ‘bad hair and worse fashion’.