pachante

She walked into the club and the whole place went silent. Like a ghost came to haunt them.

My cousin tried to flirt with her and got side-eyed like he had a bad haircut and a worse attitude.

She posted a selfie and 500 people liked it. 500. I got 3 likes and I’m the main character.

She showed up to my birthday party wearing a dress and a f***ing crown. I thought it was a costume party.

My brother tried to impress her with his car. She just said, 'That’s cute. I own three of those.'

She texted me and said, 'Don’t be a loser. Be a legend.' I had no idea what that meant, but I felt like a loser.

She came to my job interview and my boss hired her on the spot. I got the job because I was her sidekick.

She told my ex he was a 'walking joke' and then left him a 5-star review on his dating app.

She showed up at my gym and the weights started crying. I just stood there like, 'Is this real life?'

I made a joke about her hair and she threw a bag of chips at me. I got a chip in my eye and a lesson in life.

She showed up to my bar exam and passed it before I could even finish my coffee.

She posted a photo of her dog and got 10,000 likes. I posted a photo of my cat and my mom liked it.

She walked into the room and the lion king ran out screaming. I just stood there like, 'Is this a dream? Or is this my life?'

She challenged my dad to a dance-off and he lost. My dad doesn’t lose. Ever.

She texted me and said, 'If you don’t get this job, I will personally come to your house and eat your pizza.' I got the job.