O'Nan

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a guy who thinks he's a king but can't even tie his shoes properly

He tried to propose with a napkin and a broken pencil.

He called me a 'dumb bimbo' because I fixed his coffee.

He bragged about his 'royal lineage' but couldn't find his pants.

a man who uses 'I'm just being honest' as an excuse to insult everyone

He said I was 'a mess in a dress' after I spilled soup on him.

He told my mom she was 'a waste of oxygen' because she didn't like his face.

He called my dog a 'disgrace to all dogs everywhere' for barking at him.

a man who thinks he's a legend but can't even remember his own name

He forgot his own name during a meeting and blamed the coffee.

He tried to write a book but only wrote 'I am a legend' and quit.

He told a cop he was 'the king of the street' and got a ticket for being a fool.

a man who tries to be cool but ends up looking like a confused raccoon

He wore a hat backward and called it 'a fashion statement.'

He tried to dance but tripped over his own feet and fell on the floor.

He said he was 'a smooth operator' but couldn't even open a bottle of soda.

a man who yells at the world but can't even fix his own Wi-Fi

He screamed at the TV because he couldn't find the remote.

He blamed the internet for his bad mood and threw a pillow at the wall.

He yelled at his mom for not giving him enough sugar in his coffee.