Octopus Brigade, The

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1
A stupid musical group from Virginia that yells about fire-breathing chickens, lizard-cows, and dead gassy balls like they're the best things ever. They sound like a bunch of farts in a blender.
I heard them singing in my dreams. It was like being trapped in a microwave.
My dog tried to bite them. He didn’t know what hit him.
My uncle said they’re the worst thing since glitter on a math test.
2
A group of people who think they’re cool because they sing about stars and baby lizards. They’re loud, annoying, and probably have no real talent.
My teacher made me listen to them. I now hate life.
They sang at my cousin’s wedding. It was like being tortured.
I thought I was going to die from the high-pitched screaming.
3
A bunch of people who sing like they’re possessed by a chicken. They talk about stars and lizards like they’re the most important things ever. They’re the worst.
They ruined my lunch break. I had to throw my sandwich at them.
My mom said they’re louder than a garbage truck at midnight.
They sing so bad, my cat ran away.
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