oct 1 national wife’s day

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A day to tell your wife she’s the best even if she’s still mad you forgot to clean the toilet

My wife is still yelling at me. But I told her she’s the best. It didn’t help.

I said ‘you’re the best’ and she said ‘you’re the worst’ and I agreed.

I gave her a flower and she threw it at me. It was a good day.

A day to thank your wife for not leaving you even though you’re a total mess

I told my wife I’d clean the house. I lied. But she still said thanks.

She didn’t leave even though I burned the dinner. That’s love.

I said ‘thank you’ and she said ‘I’m not leaving yet’.

A day to say your wife is awesome even if she’s still mad you spilled coffee on her dress

I spilled coffee on her dress. She was mad. I said she’s awesome. She didn’t believe me.

She said I was the worst. I said she was the best. She still said I was the worst.

I tried to apologize. She said ‘you’re not even close.’