Ocean Wren

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A guy who thinks he’s the smartest person in the room and won’t shut up about it

'You think you're the only one who knows about this? I knew this before you were born, buddy.'

He tried to explain the theory of relativity to my dog and my dog looked bored.

He interrupted the movie to explain why the main character was wrong about everything.

A man who talks like he’s the only one who ever had a brain

He texted me at 2 AM to tell me he knew what I was thinking.

He argued with the pizza guy about the correct way to eat pizza.

He told my mom she was wrong about everything, including how to make bread.

A guy who acts like he’s the only one who’s ever been right

He told me he could fix my car with a paperclip and a dream.

He said the sky was green until I showed him a picture of the sky.

He claimed he invented the internet and it was just a side project.