Ocean City, New Jersey

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1
Ocean City, New Jersey is a tiny island in South Jersey that screams "summer vacation" to every Pennsylvanian who hates winter. It’s like a giant party with a side of regret.
I came to O. C. to relax, but I ended up getting a sunburn and a tattoo I don’t like.
My cousin’s dog peed on the boardwalk. It’s now a legendary event.
I tried to surf. I got thrown off the board. My dignity died in the ocean.
2
Ocean City is a summer paradise and a winter wasteland. Most of the houses belong to the shoobies who come in like a flood and leave like a disaster.
Shoobies are the worst. They rent a house for a month and leave it like a tornado hit it.
I saw a shoobie wearing a hat that said "I survived Ocean City." It was a lie.
My neighbor’s shoobie kid threw a neon green pillow at me. That’s not a crime. That’s a war.
3
Ocean City is a place where the locals know everyone’s business and the tourists are just there to get wasted and forget their lives.
My uncle got drunk and told my aunt that her ex was a "chump." He was right.
The year-rounders just chill, smoke weed, and watch the tourists get lost.
My friend got a tattoo of a dolphin and now it’s just a sore. That’s the worst part of O. C.
4
Ocean City is a town where weirdness is normal, and the only thing crazier than the locals is the boardwalk at night.
Slobber Bob is a legend. He eats pizza for breakfast and thinks he’s a superhero.
Underdog Girl is a real person who wears a cape and has a pet raccoon.
I saw a guy dance on the boardwalk and cry at the same time. That’s how O. C. works.
5
Ocean City is where the best food and the worst decisions are born. It’s the place where you go from hungry to hungover in one day.
I ate 10 slices of pizza and now I can’t walk. It was worth it.
Sack O' Subs is the only thing that could save me from my own stupidity.
Express Pizza is the reason I came to O. C. and stayed for the chaos.
6
Ocean City is a place where the surfers are wild, the homecoming queens are high, and the whole town just wants to have fun and forget about school.
My cousin is a gansta surfer with dreadlocks. He surfed in a thunderstorm. I don’t know how he survived.
The homecoming queen at my school took a hit of weed and won. It was a miracle.
I tried to be a gansta surfer. I fell off the board and got laughed at. That’s how it goes.
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