Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

you’re so obsessed with being perfect it makes your brain hurt

My socks have to be perfectly aligned or I throw a tantrum.

I alphabetized my fridge. My mom called the cops.

I got in a fight with my dog because it didn’t line up my shoes.

2

you’re like a robot that only knows how to clean

I took out the trash and it wasn’t in the exact spot I wanted. I cried.

I washed my hands 17 times because I thought I saw dirt.

I straightened my hair 3 times before I left the house.

3

you’re so anal you could be a toilet seat

I counted every step I took to the store. I got 234 steps. That’s not right.

I got angry at my brother because he didn’t fold his clothes just right.

I took a picture of my sandwich. It wasn’t symmetrical. I cried.

4

you’re the human version of a spreadsheet

I color-coded my socks. My dad said I was weird.

I lined up my pencils in order of how much I like them.

I took a 10-minute break just to organize my backpack.

5

you’re so obsessed you might as well be married to your habits

I had to brush my teeth twice because I had to do it even numbers.

I got mad at my friend because she spilled my coffee and it wasn’t even a perfect spill.

I took my dog for a walk, but I had to make sure the grass was cut exactly right.

6

you’re the reason why the world hasn’t ended yet

I alphabetized my closet. It took me two hours. My neighbor called the cops.

I counted every breath I took. I got to 1,000 and still wasn’t done.

I got into a debate with my cat over the placement of my cereal.