Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

A buddy you talk to every now and then, but only when you're not too busy being a mess

Hey, I'm alive. Want to chat? Probably not. But hey, I'm here.

I saw your post. I'm gonna ignore it. Maybe.

You texted me. I'm gonna reply. Maybe.

2

A friend who only texts you when they need something, and then disappears like a bad habit

Hey, I need a ride. I'll text you when I'm done being a human.

I'm gonna ask you for a favor. Then I'm gonna forget you exist.

I need money. I'll text you. Then I'll never speak to you again.

3

A friend you see once in a while, like a bad haircut you can't get rid of

We met at the store. I said hi. Then I left.

We saw each other at the park. I waved. Then I walked away.

We bumped into each other. I said nothing. Then I left.

4

A friend you only remember when you're drunk or broke

I texted you because I needed money. And alcohol.

We met at a bar. I remembered you. Then I forgot.

I called you at 2 AM. I needed help. And a drink.

5

A friend who only texts you when they're bored or sad

I texted you because I had nothing better to do.

I texted you because I was sad. Then I went back to being sad.

I texted you because I had no life. Then I went back to having no life.

6

A friend you only talk to when you're too lazy to text anyone else

I texted you because I didn't want to text my mom.

I texted you because I was too lazy to call anyone else.

I texted you because I was too tired to do anything else.