Oblumqueefus

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When something is so ridiculous it makes your brain short-circuit and your mouth drop open like a startled goldfish.

My boss told me to eat my desk for not showing up to work.

My dog just asked me for a raise.

I saw a man try to explain quantum physics to a chicken.

When you're so confused you think you're dreaming and your brain is trying to escape through your ears.

My friend said he turned his pet turtle into a wizard.

I tried to explain the internet to my grandpa and he cried.

My math teacher told me to solve the universe before lunch.

When something is so wild it makes you want to throw your phone out the window and yell at the sky.

My mom said she signed up for a dating app for cats.

I watched a guy try to juggle flaming potatoes.

My teacher told me I had to write a poem about my socks.

When you're so lost in disbelief you think you're in a horror movie and your brain is screaming for help.

My dad told me he joined a club for people who hate Mondays.

I tried to explain TikTok to my grandma and she said it was witchcraft.

My friend said he turned his goldfish into a DJ.

When something is so crazy it makes you want to throw a tantrum, scream into a pillow, and run away.

My neighbor tried to communicate with his plants using karaoke.

I tried to explain the internet to my dog and he just stared at me.

My teacher said we had to do a group project with the school janitor.