Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

A brainless waste of oxygen who thinks the world stops spinning just because they’re late.

I texted him 10 times about the fire. He replied, 'I was eating pizza.'

She walked into the room during a zombie apocalypse and said, 'Why is everyone screaming?'

He missed the final exam because he thought it was on Friday. It was on Tuesday.

2

A human who thinks they’re the only one who ever made a mistake.

He got a 30 on the test and said, 'That was easy. I just didn’t try.'

She ran into a wall and said, 'I knew that wall was there. I just didn’t want to be right.'

He got fired and said, 'I didn’t know I was supposed to do my job.'

3

A person who acts like the whole world is against them when they’re just bad at life.

He failed the math test and blamed the teacher for ‘cheating on the problem.’

She got dumped and said, 'He just didn’t know what he wanted.'

He spilled his coffee and said, 'The universe is out to get me.'

4

A human who doesn’t know the meaning of the word ‘notice.’

I told him about the party 5 times. He said, 'I didn’t know it was happening.'

He walked past the fire and said, 'I didn’t know there was a fire.'

I gave him the homework. He said, 'I didn’t know I had homework.'

5

A person who thinks they’re the only one who’s ever been stupid.

He dropped his phone in the toilet and said, 'That was an accident. Everyone else is just mean.'

She flunked out of school and said, 'I didn’t know I had to pass.'

He forgot his birthday and said, 'I didn’t know I had a birthday.'

6

A brainless meat sack who thinks the moon is following them.

He said, 'The moon is watching me. That’s why I’m sad.'

She thought the traffic jam was because the moon was trying to talk to her.

He got lost and said, 'The moon told me to go left.'