objectophiliac

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a person who gets hard just looking at skyscrapers and thinks the elevator is a love letter.

I saw the Empire State Building and instantly had a hard-on. The elevator was like a proposal.

My boss is an objectophiliac. He stares at the office tower like it’s his ex.

I walked past the Sears Tower and my pants were a mess. The windows were like a group chat.

someone who gets more excited about buildings than their own dating life.

I dated a building last week. It had more personality than my ex.

My friend is so into buildings, he broke up with his girlfriend for a penthouse.

I skipped my date to look at the new hotel. It was that good.

a person who gets a boner when they see a building and thinks it's flirting with them.

That office building was hitting on me. I had to look away.

The library got me a boner. It was like a seduction.

I saw the mall and it was like, 'Hey, baby, come here.' I was too embarrassed to say hi.